Searching for one’s missing part

The following is an excerpt from a samvaad (dialogue) session with Acharya Prashant.

Questioner (Q): I’m not feeling completely good with myself. So, I’m trying to search for that missing part in others. Every single time I see someone, and I think, “Oh maybe I can be complete with this guy or with that guy”, and it comes irrationally, and I get sick of it. I want to feel good with myself. How can I come to myself and not to others?

Acharya Prashant (AP): One needs to experiment with her dependencies. The questioner says — she wants to feel complete with herself so that there may remain no need to get associated with this person, that person, and seek fulfillment in the other or through the other.

It hurts us when a disappointment comes in the form of a person — “I got associated with that person. And the thing didn’t work out as per my expectation.” — That hurts. That hurts because that is very obvious. The proof is very sensual, very large, very undeniable. You see that you got into a relationship, and you go into a relationship with a person. The person is big, apparent, obvious, six feet. “I got into a relationship, it didn’t work out, I’m hurt”. Right? But then why is it that we get into relationships, often into a series of relationships? Is it because those persons are extremely important or attractive? Or is it more because we…