The one who is not dependent cannot be jealous

Acharya Prashant
2 min readDec 17, 2019

To start with, see what is Ego. It is your sense of yourself that has been borrowed from the others. I do not know myself directly. I am depending upon somebody else to tell me who I am.

A fellow comes and says, “You are brilliant”, and what do I start believing? “I am brilliant!” Now my sense of being brilliant, my idea about myself that I am brilliant depends totally upon this other person who initially told me that I was brilliant; otherwise, I am not brilliant.

If too many of them come and say that I am stupid, then I have to believe that I am stupid because even my idea of stupidity comes from others. If he says that I am brilliant and I believe it, then I will also have to believe him when he says that I am stupid.

My brilliance is not coming out of my own understanding. My sense about myself is not coming from my own understanding but is borrowed.

Now, I am dependent upon others and I want them to keep saying, “You are brilliant,” because my brilliance depends on their saying. The more they keep saying, the more special I feel.

A direct result of this would be that the day I see them telling someone else, “You are brilliant,” I will feel jealous. Let us say that I am ‘A’, he is ‘B’ and there is another entity ‘C’. Now ‘B’ tells ‘C’ that you too are brilliant. How will ‘A’ feel?


Now, do you see what jealousy is?

Now let us take a different situation. I know that I am brilliant and my sense of the self is not coming from ‘B’. I just know that I am brilliant. It is not a borrowed idea. Now, will it matter to me if ‘B’ says to ‘C’ that you are brilliant? Will I be jealous?

So, jealousy comes from dependence. The one who is not dependent cannot be jealous. The one who is his own master cannot be jealous. To be jealous means that I have accepted somebody as my master and now I want this master to remain with me. If he goes to someone else, then I feel a certain pain, and this pain is called ‘jealousy’.

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