The quality of relationships and feeling of being hurt

Acharya Prashant
2 min readNov 17, 2020

The following is an excerpt from a samvaad (dialogue) session with Acharya Prashant.

Question: Why does it happen that even friends and family members leave us whenever we start doing something authentic, genuine in life?

Acharya Prashant (AP): First and foremost, every human being is a mind. The quality of your being is the quality of your mind. All our relationships emanate from the mind. The quality of your relationships will be the same as the quality of your mind.

The depth of one’s love, the courage of one’s truth, the flight of one’s freedom, the simplicity of one’s beauty - all these depend directly on the quality of one’s mind.

In a mind that is simple and innocent, the relationships will be direct and loving.

In a mind corrupted by conditioning, fear, and ignorance, the relationships will be tainted with greed, expectations, and fear.

Want to have loving relationships?

Clean up your mind!

Want to never feel small and unworthy?

Clean up your mind!

A mind that is stuck in its own complexes and beliefs is a mind living in the darkness of unawareness. And it becomes habituated to the dark. Attached. When Truth shines like the Sun, such a mind wants to run away from the Truth or pretends that it is seeing nothing. Obviously, this cannot help for long, but the mind that is afraid of the Truth lives on hope.

Question 2: Why do we feel hurt?

AP: Hurt is a feeling of loss. A belying of expectations.A shock to beliefs. A rude jerk to the mind and its imaginations.

Can there be hurt without accumulation?

Can there be hurt without expectations and beliefs?

Are you not hurt the most when you want the most?

Who hurts us? Strangers? Or those whom we want to capture in relationships, and fail in our attempt? Is hurt not another name for the shock that my relationship is not what I imagined it to be? Hence, is hurt not a product of blind desire?

Truth never gets hurt. Only the ego gets hurt.

To live simply, innocently- in direct realization- is to live free of hurt.

You are welcome to know more about Acharya Prashant and his literature. You can also contact the Foundation directly.