Use your hurt as your resource

The following is an excerpt from a samvaad (dialogue) session with Acharya Prashant.

Questioner (Q): I see that I want to say a lot of things but I don’t, and I just be a coward. So, for example, I saw a man whip a bull with a stick but he was doing it behind the ears, under the chin where it really hurts, and I wanted to go and just grab the stick and beat him with it or at least tell him something, but I just ended up walking past and not doing anything.

Similarly, over here, in the restaurants, today, when I was going in my hotel, there was this man with this plate of eggs and then this is supposed to be a city where everyone is supposedly very pious and holy, and I wanted to smash the eggs on his face, but I just walked up the stairs past him; I didn’t even say anything. I was trembling inside and I notice when I do speak about it; so, for example, when I told my sister that would you like someone to put his hand inside you and make you pregnant and then steal your babies so he could drink your milk; it comes off very harsh and I mostly take the way of not rocking the boat because it would take a lot of… I wouldn’t be able to walk 10 meters without saying anything. How do, I guess; one, why am I such a coward, and two, how do I get to that stage where I can give the sage counsel in a way that you do which is very gentle? When I do it, it comes off with a lot of…